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so heres a photocopy of some ways to detrigger yourself
i found this really helpful and i know that i posted it before but i didnt tag it
(please do not remove the text)
[text on photocopy reads:
Grounding is a technique that helps keep someone in the present. They help reorient a person to the here-and-now and in reality. Grounding skills can be helpful in a variety of situations with *dissociation symptoms; and managing overwhelming feelings or intense anxiety. They help someone to regain their mental focus from an often intensly emotional state.
(*Dissociation is a mental process, which produces a lack of connection in a person’s thoughts, memories, feelings, actions or sense of identity. Dissociation can manifest in a variety of ways: highway hypnosis, “spacing out”, numbing, “losing touch” on a conscious level with our immediate surroundings or as a chronic dissociation as in cases of Dissociative Disorders which can result in severe impairment or inability to fuction.
(Source: Sidran Institute: Tramautic Stress Education and Advocacy website: www.sidran.org)
Grounding skills can occur within two specific approaches:
1) Sensory awareness
2) Cognitive awareness
Sensory awareness grounding exercise #1
Beging by tracing your hang on a piece of paper and label each finger as one of the five senses. Then take each finger and identify something special and safe representing each of those five senses. For example: thumb represents sight and a label for sight might be butterflies or my middle finger represents the smell sense and it could be represented by lilacs.
After writing and drawing all of this on paper, post it on your refrigerator or other safe places in the home where it could be easily seen and memorize it.
Whenever you get triggered, breathe deeply and slowly, and put your hand in front of your face where you can really see it- stare at your hand then look at each finger and try to do the five senses exercise from memory.
Source: www.stardrift.net/survivors/senses.html (this link doesnt work anymore)
Sensory awareness grounding exercise #2
-keep your eyes open, look around the room, notice your surroundings, notice details
-hold a pillow, stuffed animal or a ball
- place a cool cloth on your face, or hold something cool such as a can of soda.
-listen to soothing music
-put your feet firmly on the ground
-FOCUS on someone’s voice or a neutral conversation
Sensory Awarness Grounding exercise #3
Here’s the 54321 “game”
-name 5 things you can see in the room with you
-name 4 things you can feel (chair on my back or feet on floor)
-name 3 things you can hear right now (fingers tapping on keyboard or tv)
-name 2 things you can smell right now (or 2 things you like the smell of)
-name 1 good thing about yourself
Cognitive Awareness grounding exercise:
Reorient yourself in a place and time by asking yourself some or all of these questions:
1. Where am i?
2. What is today?
3. What is the date?
4. What is the month?
5. What is the year?
6. How old am i?
7. What season is it?
Triggering, as it is generally used in this community refers to being transported mentally or emotionally back in a time to when the abuse was occurring. Perhaps something that someone said reminded a part of you about that time, maybe even on an entirely subconscious level. It may be as severe as a flashback or “abreaction”, or it could result in a generalized sense of anxiety and terror. In order to help you “ground”, or get back into present day, members of the Mosaic Minds community have contributed to some ideas of things that they do to help themselves when they have gotten triggered.
One of the fastest ways to ground, or bring yourself back from the past mentally is to shock your body of sorts. Many people recommended ice or ice water for this. Holding an ice cube is the simplest way. Filling a bowl or even the sink with ice cubes and then covering the ice with water will allow you to put your hand or arm in the cold water. You can even splash the water on your face.
In general strong sensory input of any kind will help. Smells can help. Spritz some of your favorite perfume. Peel an orange or a lemon. Vanilla is also a strong aroma. Ammonia snaps might be handy to have nearby.
Sometimes when we get very scared, we try to become invisible by doing things like closing out eyes or holding our breath. Being conscious of these things, focusing on breathing slowly and deeply as opposed to shallowly and rapidly can help us get our bearings and calm down. Opening our eyes and noticing the things around us can help us reorient to the here and now.
Get involved with your body. Take your shoes off and rub your feet flat on the ground. Remarkably doing this can be really “grounding”. Move your body. Again, this reverses the “get invisible” reaction. Get up and move around if you can. Wave your arms. Jump up and down. Pay attention to how your body feels in a physical sense.
Keep telling yourself “that was then, this is now”. Say it outloud. Notice things that reinforce that knowledge. Get in touch with where you are. Chances are you are having a hard time remembering that the memory, whatever it is, is not happening now. Look around you. See where you are. Be aware of what is different in this place than what was in that place. Get up and touch objects. Feel their reality. Make it a point to “see 5 things. Name 5 things. Touch 5 things.” Sometimes remembering it that way can get through the haze of memories. Have a calendar nearby that has the year prominently displayed.
Sometimes having an item that you know you couldn’t possibly have had back then helps remind you that it’s now, and couldn’t possibly be happening. Notice this object and pay attention to it when you are in a more settled state. Reinforce that this is an item that will help you ground should any of you get triggered.
If there is another person in the house, talk to them. Ask for a reality check. Call a friend if no one is home. Call your T (therapist).
Once you get somewhat more settled, do something that normally calms you down anyway. Take a warm bubble bath. Play your favorite computer game. Watch a fun movie. Go for a walk. Have one of your favorite comfy foods. Read a good book.
Quick list of things to do to ground:
-get ice or ice water
-breathe- slow and deep like blowing up a balloon
-take your shoes off and rub your feet on the ground
-open your eyes and look around. See you are in a different place than then
-move around. Feel your body. Stretch out your arms, hands, fingers
-peel an orange or a lemon. Notice the smell. Take a bite. Focus on the taste
-pet your cat, dog, or rabbit
-spray yourself with your favorite perfume
-eat ice cream! Or any favorite food. Pay attention to the taste
-hold a stuffie. Pay attention to the feel of it
-repeat “this is now, not then”
-call a friend or your T (therapist)
-take a shower
-take a bath
-go for a walk. Feel the sunshine (or rain or snow)
-count nice things
-dig in the dirt in your garden
-turn lights on
-play your favorite music
-hug a tree
-touch things around you]